Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Clomp! League : Season One, Day One

Here is a recounting of the first game of rookie coach Azhog's career as he takes Azh's Bashas into a game against the human team of the Altdorf Avengers!

The night sweated with excitement as the crowd awaited the start of one of the most anticipated matches of the day.

Azh, coach of the Bashas, knew more about smashing stuntie heads than he did about the game of Blood Bowl, but he figured some of his bashing skills would come in handy. His team consisted of Earguff the Troll, four hulking Black Orcs, four swift and deadly Blitzers, one Orc with an oversized arm, Ishtam the Goblin, and several Orc Grunts to fill out the roster.

The human team marched into the converted dwarf fortress as the sound of the Greenskin drums filled the air. Their square jaws set tight, the torchlight glinting from their beady eyes, the humans were here for business. The humans themselves were hard to tell apart, but there was no mistaking the sight of the hulking Ogre brute in an Avengers uniform. He would make it tough for the Bashas to dominate the center.

The Bashas got to pick the coin flip, and Azh chose heads (heads are always good), winning the toss and choosing to receive.

First Half:

The Bashas set up a strong front line, bringing the Gugfak the Thrower up to handle the ball duties. But the humans were fast and wily. Several slipped through the line, easily sacking the hapless orc thrower and retrieving the ball. But the quarters were tight. There was an immediate fight for the ball as bodies flew in and out of the pile, the ball tumbling across the stone floor. Suddenly, one lineman bolted out of the scrum, ball in hand, preparing a throw to a lone blitzer who waited downfield, sure of the imminent touchdown. But in his excitement, he failed to hold on to the ball, and it slipped from the back of his hand, hitting the turf with a solid thud. But he quickly turned around as a Black Orc clotheslined a human blitzer who was rushing for the ball, scooped the ball from the ground, swung around to the blitzer and shoved the ball into his hands. The touchdown came moments later as the Greenskins burst into frenized cheers.

With a little less than half of the first half to play, the human team prepared to try and get a score of their own. After the kickoff, the humans gathered into a tight knot and pushed at the right side of the field.

The Bashas formed a protective pocket, seeking to prevent any sudden runs for the endzone while knocking down anyone they could. Taking a gamble, a lone orc blitzer swooped from the sidelines around the back of the human's formation, knocking the ball carrier to the ground. The ball popped loose, squirted between the tackler's legs and further backfield. Another blitzer rounded the corner and snagged up the ball, but there was not enough time to run for a score. The halftime whistle blew just as the Ogre and Troll headbutted each other and both fell unconscious to the turf.

Second Half:

Again a kickoff to the human team. This time they elected to charge up the left side. The ball carrier moving quickly to knock defenders out of the way as his entourage provided cover. But again, it was the Orc Blitzers who made the difference, putting on full steam to come around the front and put a solid shoulder into the carrier, knocking him to the ground and sending the ball into the stands. Unfortunately, an overzealous gobo in the crowd overthrew the nearby Orc Blitzer, the ball tumbling into the Bashas endzone! Letting out a Waaagh!, a lineman, the only Orc near the ball, ran as fast as his legs would carry him, reaching the ball after several agonizing seconds and turning back upfield, looking to dump the ball off to a speedy Blitzer as soon as he could.

Meanwhile, the Black Orcs, with support from Earguff the Troll, turned from the center of the field, hitting the knot of human players and driving them towards the sidelines. The fighting was brutal, with several KOs on both sides and more than one player thrown out of bounds to the not-so-tender mercies of the fans. But the Orcs held, preventing the humans from breaking free.

The Avenger Ogre, usually a stalwart in the center of the field, had first forgot what he was doing for a while, then proceeded to take on a lone Black Orc and perform a repeat of the finale of the first half, leaving both players stunned as the Basha ball carrier trotted unimpeded up the sideline. The Ogre somehow pulled his bulk off the gound and even started to make a dash for the surprised and alarmed orc! But, as players and coaches alike screamed curses and instructions, he stopped suddenly, picking at his belly to extract some bit of unidentifiable gunk, and then happily eat it as he looked around to see what all the noise was about.

The Bashas continued down the sideline, rejoicing in their second touchdown of the evening. Some time remained on the clock, but the the game was effectively over by that point. Though one of the goblin shaman did cast a last-minute curse during the kickoff, causing a fumble by the normally sure-handed human thrower. The Orc Blitzers salivated in anticipation of another quick score, but in the excitement of the moment, the little shaman forgot to remove the spell, and a series of fumbles by the orc players closed out the game.

Final Score: Bashas 2, Avengers 0

Around the League

In other non-Basha news, this week saw the two Wood Elf teams meet in a head-to-head match. The result was an embarrassing 3-0 loss by the Treehuggers as the wardancers of Errandir's Earthweavers ran around, through and over the more pass-oriented teams.

A beastman of the Stormvald Horde was killed in their match against the lizards of Bufo Draconis.

On Day Two, Azh's Bashas square off against the Wood Elves of the Timberland Treehuggers.

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